Keeping That Faith
It takes an incredible lot to smile everyday. At this point in my life, I have everything, and nothing.
On the outside, I am a seemingly successful corporate worker, with everything that anyone could ask for. But I have no relationships to speak of, and no respect, least of all for myself.
It is a painful thing to have to go through everything you do, alone, lonely. When you are surrounded by people you feel alienated from, and inferior to. When you are with the world, and the world is not with you.
And when the tears that you want so badly dried by a word of love, are left to dry with the cool, chilly wind.
And when you are such good friends with so many people, but can't be friends with yourself.
Maybe a large part of it has to do with just me. With just my perspective. It's all about how you perceive things, ainnit? If you see yourself happy, you are; if you see yourself fat, you are, etc. But surely, surely somewhere, some part of it has to be caused externally?
It's still painful.
posted by La Eposa @ 10:32 PM
