Somewhat puzzled, a little hurt
I know that people have to get on with their lives even in the wake of Sunday's tsunami. Even I have been getting on with my own life, in a manner of speaking, doing what I need to, not letting it affect the rest of my life, etc.
However, I don't understand moving on to the point of neglect. Of callousness. Of ignorance. Which, I'm ashamed to say, I've noticed in several people in my friends circle, and in my family.
Excerpts:
~ I'm so glad I'm getting out of this miserable city. I can't understand how you live here.
~ Gawd! So dangerous. Your city's so dangerous. (From a person who lives in a city where every tenth word sets off stone-throwing at lorries, and tyre-burning and the like. I mean, was this damn thing man-made??)
~ I hope at least this contains India's burgeoning population.
I mean. Hello. These people could have been you and me. In fact, it really could have been me. When the tidal wave struck, I was driving on the beach road. I was just plain lucky - I missed being washed over, with every revolution my tyres made.
Which brings me to something that I hate to have thought of, but that is undeniably true. If I had been washed away, no one would have cared. I have not had one single call or mail from my so-called friends either here, or in other cities. Not an offer of help even. They assume I'm ok. Which is (very thankfully) true for now. But if things had been unfortunate, they would never have known (or perhaps cared). I have, incidentally, received tons of mail with excited descriptions of New Year party plans and swollen budgets.
I've spent every spare minute I've had the past few days (before and after work), providing whatever support I could in the relief operations. I've joined hands with corporation workers to cart dead, decomposing bodies from the shores to waiting vans. I've bathed and bandaged children hurt and even orphaned by the waves. And all I've got for that are stinky sms-es that tell me I'm ignoring my friends. That they're hurt because when they call me, I cannot take their calls. That they think I'm a time-serving, fair-weather friend, who uses them. All because I couldn't go out pubbing with them.
For someone who bases her successes by the relationships she maintains, I think I've been an appalling failure. I obviously need to rework my priorities, and I obviously need to run a personal audit.
Note to self: Reveur, just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to love you, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they've got.
That's what's kept me going.
posted by La Eposa @ 4:38 PM
